I Have Been A Failure

Dear myself, I fucked up big time.

I spent my last 4 years achieving nothing special. Now is almost April 2020.

Lazy / Lack of Focus

I often told myself that I am smart.
I can study book / watch a lot of video tutorials in my spare time. However the most important thing is I have to use it to create something, which I didn't.
Knowledge in IT needs to be always up-to-date.
I told myself to learn / develop some app with Unity, Kotlin etc but in the end nothing happened.

Missed goals + Bad discipline

Time wait for nobody, I have failed to achieve some of my life goals.
I can only regret.

I have been overweight for several years, and I only start reducing weight last year.
I have habit of eating a lot at night, especially if I'm in bad mood. It is bad for my weight and my health. Issues like recurring knee injury after running and acid reflux are side effects from being overwright.
Now I am still overweight by 3-4 kgs based standard BMI.

I still can't do a lot of basic but important things like cooking.

Blog update

I don't use Ruby anymore. Today is the first time I touch Ruby for more than 3 years. I installed it just for maintenance of this Jekyll blog. I had to use old version of Ruby due to gems incompatibility.

I was going to update my blog with GatsbyJs. I was in the middle of Gatsby theme development, and somehow my focus was distracted.

I plan to write more blog posts, though some/most content will undoubtly be garbage. In the future I hope I can look back and see what I did during that particular year.

Foot injury

I got plantar fasciitis on my foot last month. Most likely it was effect of being overweight as well, apart from flat feet.
Now I don't run anymore, just exercise with rowing machine at home. Not sure if I will ever achieve 10 km run under 1 hour.

Covid-19

I am a home person generally, as I work remotely.
However it is stressful that I can't go around freely especially at weekend. I'd love to watch movie at cinema again or drink coffee while browsing / studying at coffee shop.

Life is full of unwanted events. Most can be attributed to my own failures.
Everything will be fine ....... hopefully.
I will try to fill this year with fabulous adventure in coding !
May God bless us and keep us strong everyday !